He's pocket-sized! - Clive Rose
We anoint Santi Cazorla Arsenal's Man Of The Match for his game against Spurs.
Here's the thing about the Internet. It's easy to snark. It's easy to sit here in my mother's basement, eating my breakfast Hot Pocket and wondering when my laundry will get done, and fire off witty zingers that would make Comic Book Guy cry. It is in that spirit that my first thought was to name Emmanuel Adebayor MOTM from yesterday - it ticks all the internet boxes of snark with a grain of truth, humor, and hahahahahahahaha fuck you Adebayor.
But no. I am not going to be that guy, my writing is not going to be that lazy. Thought number two was "The whole Arsenal team", because bwahahahahahahaha 5-2 against Spurs. Again, the editor on my left shoulder shouted down the fat friendless internet guy on my right and challenged him to do better than that, because despite 5-2 there were still some issues yesterday. Sorry, Whole Arsenal Team, no MOTM for you.
Instead, TSF is giving the MOTM for the week to...Santi Cazorla. Which I know, is only slightly less original than my first two ideas, but holy balls people did you see Santi Cazorla yesterday? One of the things I love about elite athletes is that they routinely make the impossible look effortless. When Ken Griffey Jr. was in his prime in Seattle, he constantly bitched about how nobody paid any attention to him when he did something amazing, and how everyone expected that he would give all-star performances every single night (which was crap, but bear with me for a minute here). What was really going on there was that he WAS giving All-Star performances every single night, it's just that that was his normal level, so it was harder to notice when he did something that was by his own standards truly outstanding.
By mere mortals' standards, Griffey was doing truly outstanding things every single game. And that's why Cazorla gets MOTM this week and why by the end of the season we might either have to cap his MOTM wins or name the award the Santi Cazorla Memorial MOTM award. Santi is a joy to watch - his control makes me weep for my limited athletic skills, his field vision (is that a thing in soccer?) once he gets the ball is mindblowing, and his pace doesn't hurt either. He doesn't just do all the little things right, he does them better than almost anybody in a red and white shirt right now. And he scores goals, too, which is nice.
So, Santi, here's to a Man Of The Match performance for you. Your MOTM beer cozy and coaster set is on its way.